Why Amber Rose Changed My Whole Perspective on Feminism

Why Amber Rose Changed My Whole Perspective on Feminism

Eboni Lacey 2015Very rarely do I do this – admit when I’m wrong. It’s also very rarely that I change my entire perspective on something that I’m so passionate about – feminism. But this blog is known for being raw, honest and bold. It’s about discussing mistakes and finding ways to learn from them. Here’s one that I learned from.

Almost a year ago I published a blog called “Slut Shaming or Shaming Yourself.” It took a major dig at Superhead after an interview where she discussed sexual relationships and said that “she shouldn’t be bullied or slut shammed for her actions as Superhead.” The story then discussed the topic of women that have sex with men solely for the purpose of fame and recognition. And I threw Amber’s name into the mix along with a few other names.

The point of that blog was to discuss the danger behind having sex in this manner as there are many young women that have been manipulated, raped and killed due to prostitution, stripping and promiscuous sex. And I felt that women that promote having sex as a way to climb up a latter are sending the wrong message to young women that think there are no consequences to agreeing to have sex in exchange for something else.

What followed after that blog was a bunch of debates on my Instagram as some felt I was slut shamming and others felt


Photo from JenniferBrinx.com

that I was standing up for those women that have been hindered due to their sexual decisions. It bought some conflict and I had a few unfollows but that was it. The earth kept spinning and I kept on blogging.

Though after some serious thought and after reading about Amber Rose, following her Instagram and watching the YouTube videos at the Slut Walk, I realized that my perspective about her and this aspect of feminism was completely wrong and one-sided.

Though Amber Rose did strip at one point of time in her life as well as date Kanye West, she has many other accolades that people are just now noticing. I find it incredibly disturbing that people still refer to her as a “former stripper” or as “Wiz Khalifa’s ex-wife” without acknowledging that she’s an active philanthropist, model, eyewear designer, actress, filmographer and even an author.

Also, she became a national advocate for all women when she took over the Slut Walk movement, a historic worldwide campaign that started originally in Canada after a Toronto police officer told a crowd of college women that if they wanted to avoid sexual assault, they shouldn’t dress like sluts.

Through reading her story, I’ve come to realize it’s not women like her that are sending the wrong message to young girls, but the asshole of Patriarchy that continues to degrade women by referring to them as former strippers, no matter what else they’ve done in society.

As a feminist, I’ve finally understood that you HAVE to be pro-women in every aspect, from the woman who gets abortions every month to the woman who strips for pennies because she fucking feels like it.

It is necessary to educate women on the dangers of sexual actions, and there are many non-profits, charities and foundations that do so.

And, feminists are fighting for that as well, but they don’t fight against women because women are not the enemy. The true enemy is the patriarchy, not liberated women that enjoy doing whatever they feel.

As women we are so divided on every level – conservative vs. liberal, educated vs. uneducated, stay at home Moms vs. working women, skinny vs. fat, celibate vs. promiscuous, white vs. black, independent vs. dependent, prolife vs. prochoice, pretty vs. ugly – the list goes on and on.

And we think that because we identity with one of these aspects, we are better than another woman, which is completely counterproductive of feminism. Feminism means celebrating our similarities, not arguing about our differences.

Feminism means looking at another woman and saying “That’s a Bad Bitch,” not secretly thinking about how better you are than she is.

Amber Rose has completely changed an entire aspect of feminism that all women really need to acknowledge. She embodies a certain sense of sexual liberation that all women can really appreciate. Not bad for a “stripper” huh? Go, Muva go!

…And to those women that still haven’t paid attention to her story and continue to discredit her, I’m sure one day you will eat your words, just as I am eating mine. Hey, at least I have the guts to do so.